In my life, I have realized I have a soft spot for ugly women. Like sometimes at a mall or maybe in a running event, like she offers something for me to buy, I have more tendency to buy than if a beautiful woman offers it to me. Yes, I will not sugarcoat my word with terms such as less beautiful or less favored. It may not seem obvious, but there is such a thing as a universal beauty standard. No matter how you won’t accept it and refuse it, beauty is subjective. For each person, what beauty is is different. But at some degree, there is a universal standard for beauty. For example, no way Kekeyi would be accepted as Victoria’s Secret angels even though Kekeyi has the height, perfected the runway, etc. No way Kekeyi would be in the cover of Vogue magazine. No way will we hear a healthy young girl say with an honest intent that they aspire to be as beautiful as Kekeyi.

Sometimes when I read my words. It all sounded like words from someone who has figured it all. But the truth is, I’m far from it. Of course sometimes I feel like I am better than most people, I’m sure people too at some degree. But then I also realize that it’s my ego talking. My real self would know it’s not true. Sometimes I just need to be reminded.

Phew.. finally I finished the book. While at it, I took a chance to write all the questions I had before googling it.

Here are the lists:

1. Lucy australopithecines –> a fossil record found in Ethiopia, dated at 3,2 million years old. First bipedal ape recorded.
2. Difference between homo and australopithecines. Mostly physical features, as shown in picture below.

3. How long homo Erectus roams the earth –> 2 million years. 2 million years compared to only 10.000 years of recorded history? Imagine how many have died and what kind of stories they had.
4. Why being monogamous is beneficial for evolution?
To prevent conflicts in a harmonious society. Since our strength comes from collective collaborative behavior.
5. How do they know it’s Homo sapiens or neanderthals that made the art?
It was because the art was dated to a time in Europe where sapiens haven’t arrived yet, while Neanderthals have.
6. Oldiest Homo sapiens art
Blombos Cave –> but the search result is disappointing, the art was not really artsy to me.
Leang Bulu Sipong –> this one is second oldest and it is located in my home country, Indonesia. This painting is magnificent.
7. Fossil record showed that 40.000-60.000 years ago, Homo sapiens didn’t spread to Europe while Neanderthals did. Maybe they were at war and genocide happened, finally Neanderthals was defeated and Homo sapiens now roams Europe?
8. Are asians descendant of denosivans?
Not much known about denosivans as studies are so limited due to fossil record limitations. But in my random guess, maybe denosivans cremated their bodies. My guess is only at 10% believability.
9. Catalhoyuk first building of Homo sapiens
Apparently not, it’s Jericho in Palestine! I then looked up Jericho and it’s so cool! Is that where all those stories began?
10. When did homo Erectus evolved into homo sapiens?
They didn’t evolve directly, more like this table below. The question of when becomes unimportant.

11. Why did all other homos become extinct?
Maybe Homo sapiens or earlier homos, battle over resources with other homos. There are still other apes and great apes because they are not considered a threat to homos.
12. Lake Makgadikgadi -> where first Homo sapiens live
Homo erectus left when drying period of this lake began, and later Homo sapiens appeared.

There you go.
And about previously why we exist. It is as I expected. Nothing religious or spiritual. He doesn’t know and in his opinion it’s purely random and by the grace of this randomness that we exist.

I have a lot of things that I believe.
Among those things, what I most believe are that our personalities are descended from our parents. Our parents from theirs, and so it goes.
Then our brought personalities combined with our experiences, what we eat, breathe, consume, our environments, and basically everything we’re in contact with, they will then create new personality. Then this new personality will be written in code into our DNA. And this coded memory will get passed to our children through the combination of sperm and ovum.

And I find it so amusing how a single cell can bring lots of life informations. It’s like a super huge memory card. (But apparently after I did some quick search, it was only amount to 37,5 MB of data in a single sperm.)

I don’t have a hard evidence whether what I believe is true or not. But I watched it from people around me. There are some personalities that were never taught to them, but somehow they have it, and apparently their parents have it, too! For example, there was this friend in high school whose father ran away when he was little. His father was a womanizer. And I think you can guess what my friend was….

Since I observed it from people around me, of course it’s not a matter of scientific truth, it’s a matter of belief. And disagreeing with me is totally okay.

Although maybe from this blog, you may see myself as an overthinking person.
But in life, I’m pretty stable. Maybe somewhere in my other posts I once said that my superpower was forgetting. After a few nights sleep, I forget what has hurt me so badly.
So in life, I sometimes think I’m an anchor for broken people.

There was someone in my university years. He was broken, too many traumas.
At times as a friend I thought I wanted to save him.
But eventually after a few tries, nothing’s changed, and I realized something.
You can’t save someone who doesn’t want to be saved.

And this clip from Bojack Horseman accurately depicts what happened.

Terrible? and also amazing?

Terrible that now when I’m bored and have nothing to do, just like people who smoke, I usually open Instagram and let my brain rot while watching all those stories and short videos. And also when there’s some big news, like minister reshuffling, Nepal riot, and Charlie Kirk’s assassination, I feel like the last person who knows about them.

But amazing in terms of not seeing shallow opinions from stupid people. Not overly stressed about anything that is outside of my control, especially when you intentionally avoid politic-related topic, but then all your friends posted on their stories are politic-related. I’m not exactly apathetic, but when I saw those news, my blood boiled because I cared a little too much, and it drained me mentally. And I am a firm believer of keeping yourself safe first, and only then you keep others safe. Like if you want to help a drown person you have to be cautious, too, if they panic they can drown you.

I have always been a science guy.
Science is a part of my life.
Yes, my knowledge about science is not as sophisticated as most people who dwell themselves in the world of science. I sometimes (or if I’m honest: often) don’t understand Veritasium videos. I don’t really care about the calculations, but I am always curious about how things come to be.

So I have this book right here.

I have just read the introduction but it seems promising. Although, I prefer the fun and more down-to-earth language used by Bill Bryson in his book A Short History of Nearly Everything.

Maybe I’ll review it, maybe I won’t. Since this book is more like a food, difference is it’s only to satisfy my curiosity. I don’t know if I’m going to get anything worthy to share with you guys. But if I do, I’ll write about it!